Overheard in the Office

Overheard in the Office-a gabfest related to all things ... well.. overheard in the office. Submit your scoop here.

3PM All My Promises to Myself
Coworker #1: You touched the nipple? You broke it?
Stan*: I didn't break the nipple!
Coworker #2, walking in: What did you break, Stan?

1PM Lunch
Co-worker #1: Is cheesecake a cake or a pie?
Co-worker #2: Hmm...good question. I think it's pie, 'cause it's got a crust.
5900 Wilshire Boulevard in Los Angeles, California

3PM They Stopped Doing the Circular Because of the Weird Envelopes
Customer: Do you have a circular for this week?
Cashier: Uh, no. We don't have those.Customer: You don't have a flyer advertising your weekly specials?
Cashier: Oh, you mean this?
Customer: Yeah! The circular. What I said.
Cashier: Ma'am, this is not a circular. This is a rectangle.
Target in Waldorf, Maryland

3PM Actually, He's Leaving Reminders For Himself on His Voicemail
Office manager, on the phone: Which one of Mommy's boyfriends beat you badly enough as a child to turn you into the bitter, empty, hollow shell of a human being you are today?
Supervisor, to trainee: See? That's why we have to answer the phone quickly in this office: to keep the managers from picking up the phone. Ever.
221 Corporate Gateway Boulevard in Columbia, South Carolina